Friday, November 9, 2012   21 ♥

Last weekend I saw Taking Back Sunday and Bayside. Adam Lazzara was on top of me at one point. I heard “The Ballad of Sal Villanueva” and sang every song until I almost lost my voice.

I got a phone call from the boyfriend this morning saying he got someone to cover part of his shift so he could take me to see Phil Wickham. My grandma is excited to babysit the munchkin. Two concerts in one week? Who am I?

Then I got an email saying I officially got that position I’d been wanting. I passed all of the exams and now I’m waiting for all the paperwork to be sent.

I’m crying. God is so good. The fact that He has laid everything into place for me to have the opportunities to give Harper everything she needs blows my mind. I am so blessed. I don’t deserve any of this, but I’m so grateful.

Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. - Romans 12:12
Tuesday, November 6, 2012   4 ♥
“I urge, then, first of all, that requests, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for everyone— for kings and all those in authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness.”

— 1 Timothy 2:1-2 (via blowingraspberriess)

Saturday, November 3, 2012   2 ♥
“Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”

— 1 Corinthians 13:6 - 7

Tuesday, October 30, 2012   2442 ♥
“

As I looked at these pictures of the babies being evacuated, I had a depressing thought. What are the financial situations of these babies’ parents? Are they poor? Do they have insurance? Are they on Medicaid? Medicaid is a health program that pays for medical services for those who cannot afford them. It is jointly funded by the federal and state governments. In some ways, I’d be happy if you were learning this information for the first time right now; the reason being that you don’t have to rely on Medicaid. Regardless, I suspect that if you had some “Medicaid” in your pocket last night, you’d have gladly given it to these precious babies to ensure their health and safety. It’s a good thing. If one of those babies were poor, I don’t suspect you’d want to punish her because her dad got laid off from his manufacturing job or because leukemia killed her older brother and bankrupted her parents just in time for her birth. If you don’t like these examples, tough shit; they’re how people get poor in the United States of America in 2012. I don’t want you to like them.

I’d also ask that you think about those babies when you vote next week. Or think about your own baby, or maybe a baby you know or perhaps work with. (Wouldn’t it be cool to work with a baby?)

”

— Rob Delaney: After Sandy  (via elesheva)

(via maiathebee)

Monday, October 29, 2012   9 ♥
so thankful. He sent me this when I was still in my stubborn denial phase. The one where I consistently refused to let him call me his girlfriend and was actually really lame and rude. And I’m so glad to be out of that place. It’s not fun walking around with all your walls up. Life is so much easier when you let people in. It’s also easier when those people are more than willing to prove they’re worth it. I like where I am right now. God is good. I can’t be anything but thankful.

so thankful.

He sent me this when I was still in my stubborn denial phase. The one where I consistently refused to let him call me his girlfriend and was actually really lame and rude. And I’m so glad to be out of that place. It’s not fun walking around with all your walls up. Life is so much easier when you let people in. It’s also easier when those people are more than willing to prove they’re worth it. I like where I am right now. God is good. I can’t be anything but thankful.
Friday, October 26, 2012   13 ♥

Lots of emotions. I don’t even know where to begin. This past week has been rough on me. There’s a lot on my plate and then I realized I’ve been avoiding dealing with a lot of stuff that’s happened in my life, and now I have to be a grown up and stop disconnecting from certain things.

Being an adult is tough, y’all.

Tuesday, October 23, 2012   22 ♥
unending love, amazing grace Isn’t it crazy how God can bless you so immensely after all of your failures? It’s impossible to wrap my head around the concept of receiving unconditional love. After years of giving, someone has walked in and filled in every single empty space. Answering every single question, abolishing every doubt. To be so sure about something is scary. This man has done nothing short of everything I need. He’s been the one to show me how a real man loves and provides. He’s the only man I’ve ever known who has taken the lead and been patient enough to show me the right path. For years I prayed about what I wanted, and when I got pregnant I sat down and cried and told God that maybe I didn’t know what was right for me. So I prayed. And prayed some more. Sometimes out of frustration and mostly out of desperation to know how the hell I was supposed to go about being the woman and mother He had planned for me to be. Then I took on every single burden and task at hand, knowing full well that wasn’t how it was meant to be, but we do what we have to with the cards we’re dealt. Then after I got that all in place, I realized I had sacrificed time with God to do what I decided was right. So I back tracked to the point where I had chosen to go my own way and take care of things myself. Some of you may know me, but for those of you who don’t, I’m a caregiver. I’ve always been maternal. It’s just my thing. I guess it would be my gift? I don’t know if that’s really a gift though. Anyways, I came to the conclusion that once again I was carrying all the burden, so I laid it down and walked with Christ instead of away and somehow this path to finding myself in Christ led me to finding this man. This man that I had prayed for so many times. And I resisted it. I felt like I didn’t deserve what God was offering me. And that’s what so hilarious, that I spent years praying about something to come to the conclusion that maybe I had just screwed up one too many times to deserve it and I should just suck it up and be on my own and raise Harper. Then out of nowhere God just pushes me right into this wall I had built. The one that was keeping me from surrendering everything completely. So little by little I took it down and figured if I had come this far I might as well take a leap of faith. So here I am, finally realizing that not all the good ones are taken. I do deserve love, unconditionally. And I can look back on everything now and see why I had to go through it. Everything happens for a reason. “God, I love this, if ever there was a place that I could stay, I’ve found it.”

unending love, amazing grace

Isn’t it crazy how God can bless you so immensely after all of your failures? It’s impossible to wrap my head around the concept of receiving unconditional love. After years of giving, someone has walked in and filled in every single empty space. Answering every single question, abolishing every doubt. To be so sure about something is scary. This man has done nothing short of everything I need. He’s been the one to show me how a real man loves and provides. He’s the only man I’ve ever known who has taken the lead and been patient enough to show me the right path. For years I prayed about what I wanted, and when I got pregnant I sat down and cried and told God that maybe I didn’t know what was right for me. So I prayed. And prayed some more. Sometimes out of frustration and mostly out of desperation to know how the hell I was supposed to go about being the woman and mother He had planned for me to be. Then I took on every single burden and task at hand, knowing full well that wasn’t how it was meant to be, but we do what we have to with the cards we’re dealt. Then after I got that all in place, I realized I had sacrificed time with God to do what I decided was right. So I back tracked to the point where I had chosen to go my own way and take care of things myself. Some of you may know me, but for those of you who don’t, I’m a caregiver. I’ve always been maternal. It’s just my thing. I guess it would be my gift? I don’t know if that’s really a gift though. Anyways, I came to the conclusion that once again I was carrying all the burden, so I laid it down and walked with Christ instead of away and somehow this path to finding myself in Christ led me to finding this man. This man that I had prayed for so many times. And I resisted it. I felt like I didn’t deserve what God was offering me. And that’s what so hilarious, that I spent years praying about something to come to the conclusion that maybe I had just screwed up one too many times to deserve it and I should just suck it up and be on my own and raise Harper. Then out of nowhere God just pushes me right into this wall I had built. The one that was keeping me from surrendering everything completely. So little by little I took it down and figured if I had come this far I might as well take a leap of faith. So here I am, finally realizing that not all the good ones are taken. I do deserve love, unconditionally. And I can look back on everything now and see why I had to go through it. Everything happens for a reason.

“God, I love this, if ever there was a place that I could stay, I’ve found it.”

Thursday, October 18, 2012   14 ♥

“But the beauty of grace is that it makes life not fair”

This is the only thing I can think after this past week. I know you’re probably tired of hearing how happy I am.

I am so blessed. I don’t deserve all of this. I am the luckiest lady in the universe.